Thursday, September 30, 2004

Let the Quotes Talk

"Today, in most of Iraq, children are about to go back to school..."

--George W. Bush, President's Radio Address, September 25, 2004

Five days later...

"A series of bombs killed 35 children and seven adults Thursday as U.S. troops handed out candy at a government ceremony to inaugurate a new sewage treatment plant. Hours earlier, a suicide blast killed a U.S. soldier and two Iraqis on the capital's outskirts."

-- AP, September 30, 2004

And just seven days ago...

"We are succeeding in Iraq."

--Interim Iraqi Prime Minister Iyad Allawi

Who to believe? Who to believe?

Day Two

When I called my sister this morning to tell her about the kidnapping, she cried. The bastards made my little sister cry. Damn intolerant conservatives.


My parents have posted a $25,000 reward. If you've seen my sign, please contact the police or email attackzacattack (at) yahoo (dot) com. With your assistance, we can bring the yard sign home safely and no one will get hurt.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004


Today at approximately 3:30pm, I put a Kerry/Edwards sign in the little patch of grass where you turn off of the main road and follow my driveway the half-mile up to the house. I was quite tickled with my Kerry/Edwards sign, because it was only the second I had ever seen in my town because this place is disproportionately conservative. And yet we have a Democrat congressman. Go figure.

Anyway, after I put the sign in my yard, I went to the gym, followed by dinner with friends, and then this hangout place for some pool until approximately 11:30pm. At that time, I drove to my house and as I'm turning into my driveway I notice that there is no Kerry/Edwards sign. Shocked as I was, I got out of my car, thinking that it had blown over and it was lying in the grass. No. I looked around where I had stuck it in the ground. Nothing. Nothing further up the road, nothing further down the road.

Some bastard stole my Kerry/Edwards yard sign.

The jackasses control the legislative branch, the judicial branch and the executive branch of this government. And the media, for crying out loud. And yet they feel so threatened by my yard sign that they need to rip this piece of private property off of my... well, private property?

We freed an entire country so that they can exchange ideas without fear of retribution or harm. And yet my views must be silenced.

This is a sad, sad day for the Republican Party. I have never been happier about not being a Republican in my whole life.

*Except maybe when Republican Senate Majority Leader Trent Lott made a reference to his colleagues segregationist ways, saying that this country would be better off if we had listened to him. That might have taken the cake.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Attack of the Conscience

What happens when soldiers no longer believe in a war that a rich, white man with sketchy family connections and no war experience forced them to fight?

Fewer than two-thirds of the former soldiers being reactivated for duty in Iraq and elsewhere have reported on time, prompting the Army to threaten some with punishment for desertion.

The former soldiers, part of what is known as the Individual Ready Reserve (IRR), are being recalled to fill shortages in skills needed for the conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Of the 1,662 ready reservists ordered to report to Fort Jackson, S.C., by Sept. 22, only 1,038 had done so, the Army said Monday. About 500 of those who failed to report have requested exemptions on health or personal grounds.

"The numbers did not look good," said Lt. Col. Burton Masters, a spokesman for the Army's Human Resources Command...

-- Tom Squitieri, "Former Soldiers Slow to Report," USA Today

Well, Duh

"The evidence about Saddam having actual biological and chemical weapons ... has turned out to be wrong."

-- British Prime Minister Tony Blair at his party's annual conference on 09/28/04, his nearest yet to a mea culpa.

When are people going to realize this and stop being so ignorant?

Monday, September 27, 2004

Google Me

Yet again, I have some Google email invitations to hand out to the lucky people who either comment on this post asking for one, or email me at attackzacattack [at] yahoo [dot] com. It's that simple.

I'm off to the gym. Later.

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Activists Unite!

According to the Republican Platform, 2004, "The Republican Party shares the position of the United States Supreme Court in Miller v. California, 413 U.S. 15 (1973)."

Cause, yeah, they weren't so activist then.

They surely weren't in 1954 in Brown v Board of Education when the Court went against an overwhelming majority of Americans and decided that separate was not equal. There's no activism in their veins.

But they sure were activists in 1973 with Roe v Wade. In March of 2004, 54% of those polled by ABCNews and Washington Post say they support the woman's right to choose at least in some cases.

And that Supreme Court of 2003 when they struck down anti-sodomy laws in Lawrence v Texas, they are certainly activists. In May 2003, 54% (seems to the be the magic number) of those polled said that homosexuality should be deemed an acceptable alternative lifestyle. According to an independent poll*, 83% of those polled were in favor of gay rights.

So let's see here. Americans hated Brown v Board, that's not activism. Americans support Roe and Lawrence and when the Supreme Court voted that way, the court overstepped their bounds and must be stopped.

Hypocrisy, anyone?


* The independent poll was conducted by me to random people on my AIM buddy list. Those with away messages up, or those idle, were discounted. One, who did not respond, was also discounted. The one out of six who voted nay was being sarcastic, but my poll was too scientific to take that into account. Her nay vote stands. And I'm ignoring her.

Gay Bashing

According to the Republican Platform, 2004, "We believe, and the social science confirms, that the well-being of children is best accomplished in the environment of the home, nurtured by their mother and father anchored by the bonds of marriage."

And I suppose that also means that there would be something in the platform describing a plan on making divorce illegal if there are children involved. Or perhaps an outline of mandatory marriages for unwed mothers. But, alas, I could find no such statements. The sanctity of marriage is too fragile for such common-sense laws. If we're going to police morality in this country, let's kick it up a notch and not be so hypocritical! Come on!

I wonder what three-time divorced Rush "Libido" Limbaugh would have to say about this.

Assist Me

According to the Republican Platform, 2004, "...we oppose euthanasia and assisted suicide, which especially endanger the poor and those on the margins of society."

What in the hell? Can someone explain to me why if you're poor, you're more likely to want to die than if you were rich? I don't see how the two go together. If you want to die -- are of sound body and mind and choose to die -- how can a doctor or loved one "endanger" you? It doesn't make sense. You want to die. Endangerment is part of the definition.

And while you're at it, please explain to me why the Republican platform does not also say, "We oppose unneeded wars, which especially endanger the poor and those on the margins of society." Because there, everyone knows that there's a correlation between poverty and military service. Why aren't we protecting them? Eh, George?

I'm a Marionette!

Speaking to the United States Congress, Iraqi interim Prime Minister Ayad Allawi had a few interesting things to say, including the most obvious and yet never enunciated, "I'm Bush's lapdog, hear me roar."

To begin his oration, he had three important messages for the Congress. The first being, "We are succeeding in Iraq."

It's like a little pep-talk, get it? We are succeeding in Iraq.

Two car bombs wounded American and Iraqi troops west of the capital Sunday and a few hours later the U.S. military announced the arrest of a senior Iraqi National Guard commander on suspicion of ties to insurgents, underscoring the challenges to building a strong Iraq security service capable of restoring stability. -- AP, 09/26/04

We are succeeding in Iraq.

As of Friday, Sept. 24, 2004, 1,042 members of the U.S. military have died since the beginning of the Iraq war in March 2003, according to the Defense Department. -- AP, 09/26/04

We are succeeding in Iraq.

The brother of British hostage Kenneth Bigley tonight said that "Tony Blair's silence is the kiss of death" as he revealed to a packed Labour Fringe meeting in Brighton that his brother was still alive. ... With Mr Blair due to address the Labour Party conference in 36 hours' time, Mr Bigley told the meeting: "Please, on behalf of my brother ask Mr Blair to pick up the phone, call Mr Bush and call off the blockade of the two women." -- Guardian, 09/26/04

He goes on to say, "We are fighting for freedom and democracy, ours and yours." See what he did there? How cutesy. Americans are dying -- over a thousand thus far, several thousand wounded -- because they're fighting for the freedom and democracy of Iraq AND the United States. See, if it weren't for Bush's decision to go to war against Iraq, our freedom and our democracy would be hanging in the balance. Because, as you know, Iraq had weapons of mass destruction and had a reconstituted nuclear development plan, and was housing terrorists. Oh wait, no. He wasn't doing any of that.

But in the face of facts, we are fighting this war in Iraq for freedom and democracy. Not just the Iraqi's, but our own. Those damn liberals who question our strong leader are working for the enemy. This isn't a just-Iraq war. It's global, it's in our backyard.

Thanks be to Bush who fights daily for our freedom and our democracy. Thanks to him for pondering over whether to postpone the presidential elections -- the first time in our nation's history. For our best interest, of course. Thanks be to him for protecting homosexuals who wanted to frolick with each other, by supporting sodomy laws that kept them apart. Thanks to him for making sure that the government can check up on me and my library book selections. He's a freedom fighter.

The second important message Allawi wanted to convey to the American Congress is, of course, "Thank you, America." I can't stay mad at him! He's too sweet.

"The overwhelming majority of Iraqis are grateful. They are grateful to be rid of Saddam Hussein..."

An Iraqi poll to be released next week shows a surge in the popularity of Moqtada al-Sadr, the radical young Shia cleric fighting coalition forces, and suggests nearly nine out of 10 Iraqis see US troops as occupiers and not liberators or peacekeepers. -- Financial Times, 05/20/04

Yep. We're loved. And Allawi is spreading falsehoods in order to bolster the notion that Bush's little Iraq fancy is exactly what the doctor ordered. But why should we think he'd say anything but nice things about Bush and his administration? He was hand-picked to be the leader of his country. He wasn't elected. He wasn't voted in with a majority of the vote (well, neither was Bush). Bush declared him the leader. Who's going to bite the hand who feeds him?

Instead of taking the time to bring together a coalition to fight Saddam and Iraq and the insurgents after the fact, there's us. As of Friday, we've lost 1,042 service men and women. The country with the next highest fatality rate is Great Britain with a whopping 65 deaths. Italy has 19; Poland, 13; Spain, 11; Bulgaria, 6; Ukraine, 8; Slovakia, 3; Thailand, 2; the Netherlands, 2; and Denmark, El Salvador, Estonia, Hungary and Lativia have reported one death each.

You tell me we're not the country fighting the brunt of this war. And I dare you to tell me that we're succeeding.

Do... or Die

"These doubters [aka Kerry/those who will vote for Kerry] risk underestimating our country and they risk fueling the hopes of the terrorists."

-- Puppet... err, Prime Minister Ayad Allawi of Iraq, in his address to Congress.

That's right. Put your full faith in Bush, or you're fueling the hopes of the terrorists. You're giving them what they want.

I guess it's part of the one-two punch with Cheney's, "Because if we make the wrong choice [aka voting for Kerry], then the danger is that we'll get hit again." Remember: Fear is the Republicans' best friend.

Too Damn Close

Two weeks ago, Bush had a 12-point lead in the Time poll. And now that lead has shrunk to just 4 points. According to New York Times, in swing states, new voters are being registered in heavily Democratic counties at a much faster pace than in Republican-leaning counties -- by some 250:25 in Ohio, 60:12 in Florida. Who says Kerry's dead in the water?

Friday, September 24, 2004

Osama Found!

Very, very interesting. Hmmm...

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Rainbow Power

How do we know God loves gays? It's the Super-Duper-Double-Rainbow-Kickass-Hellyeah-Inyourface One-Two Punch straight from God to you and me.

And God loves Flamingo Jones, too.

Polling Data, again

According to FOX News, Bush is only slightly ahead of Kerry, 45% to 43%. And before Tom goes apeshit on me for using such a biased news source like FOX News, let's look at the NBC/Wall Street Journal poll which has Bush ahead of Kerry, 48% to 45%.

Makes the Time and Gallup polls look positively silly. Silly polls, you're silly.

Waste of Time

Is it selfish of me to wish that Congress would do something constructive, like balancing the budget, combatting poverty, or getting children insured.

"Federal courts would be barred from striking the words "under God" from the Pledge of Allegiance to the American flag under a bill passed on Thursday by a House of Representatives split largely along party lines."

This is the most pressing issue this country faces today?!

No Recruits

The Army National Guard will fall 5,000 soldiers short of its recruiting goal this year, in part because fewer in the active-duty force are switching to part-time service, knowing how frequently Guard units are being dispatched to war zones, the Guard's top general said Thursday.

Go figure.

It will be the first time since 1994 that the Guard has missed its sign-up goal.


"Talk to the leader. I'm not the expert on how the Iraqi people think, because I live in America where it's nice and safe and secure. But I'd talk to this man."

--George W. Bush, September 23, 2004, talking to reporters.

Uh huh, uh huh, uh huh. And lollipops sprout out of gumdrop trees.

Wednesday, September 22, 2004

When Metal Kills

A woman was killed Wednesday when a nearly 7-foot-tall metal crucifix fell on her head in a small town in southern Italy, police said. Maddalena Camillo, 72, was walking in the main square in the village of Sant'Onofrio when the crucifix toppled from a monument being restored for a religious celebration, police said.


Leave it to FOX News to really drive home a stupid point. Tonight on FOX & Friends, co-host Brian Kilmeade suggested that Yusuf Islam's (aka Cat Stevens) name alone should have alerted airport security to give him "a good close look."

KILMEADE: ...If your name is Yusuf Islam, you better have a good close look at him.

HILL: No, that's not true, because that is profiling. You can't say every person with a Muslim name just as you can't say every person with an Italian name in New York you should look for contacts to the Mafia, right? What's the difference? What's the difference?

KILMEADE: But let me just say, if the IRA [Irish Republican Army] had declared war on America, you better believe they would be patting me down left and right before I went on United [Airlines], because I stand to be Irish. So they declare war on us.
Such a wonderful thought, that is, eh? If Scotland declared war on America, I suppose Mr. McGibboney should better watch out. It sounds all a little too "top o'the morning to ya" to go without at least a cursory pat-down.

But where would we stop? That's really the question, isn't it? You can't just think that everyone with an Islamic sounding name is going to be a terrorist. Paranoia will soon take over and then you'll miss the real terrorists when they show up all blond haired and blue eyed. Profiling just doesn't work.

Not all Muslims are bad. Most believe in peace and coexistence. But what we see as the Islamic Radicals is to Islam as the KKK is to Christianity, only the radicals are worldwide and have a lot more gumption. But it's the same thing. The Ku Klux Klan -- mean mothers, but not representative of Christianity as a whole.

Keep that in mind.

And remember what happened the last time we profiled racially?

Watch Yourself!

The world becomes dangerouser and dangerouser every day. But, thank goodness, Homeland Security is on the case and sniffing out the bad guys. Through sleepless nights, they relentlessly hunt down known terrorists and suspected terrorists and never stop until 1) they catch their man, or 2) no one cares anymore.

The Homeland Security taskforce was in high gear on Tuesday when a Washington D.C.-bound plane from England was diverted to Bangor, Maine, after a suspected terrorist's name turned up on the plane's passenger list.

The man, Yusuf Islam, will be deported back to Britian, because he's so much of a threat that he can't be in the US but England's okay enough to house him. This dastardly bastard was travelling with his daughter -- the nerve of some terrorists -- who was allowed to stay in the United States -- to continue his terror-inspired actions, I'm sure.

Thank God Tom Ridge sprung into action and interceded before Yusuf -- aka Cat Stevens -- could roam around this country... singing, or what have you.

Damn him and his terror connections. Kind of adds new meaning to

Baby, I love you
But if you wanna leave, take good care
Hope you make a lot of nice friends out there
But just remember there's a lot of bad and beware
I bet there are secret, subliminal terrorist instructions in those lyrics.

About Time

"It's a humorous statement that doesn't mean anything. You can't lie to God -- it's ridiculous. If it's an insult, I certainly don't think it was, but if they are offended, then I certainly offer an apology."

--Evangelist Jimmy Swaggart, September 22, 2004, apologizing for his comment a few days ago where he told his listening audience that if a homosexual ever looked at him, he'd kill him and tell God he died.

You may remember Swaggart as a popular television evangelist during the 1980s until a 1987 sex scandal involving a prostitute that he met in a seedy New Orleans motel. Swaggart never confessed to anything more than an unspecified sin. A few years later, he was stopped by police while driving in California with a suspected prostitute in his car.

Monday, September 20, 2004

From the Mouth of Babes

"Bush sucks."

--A random six-year old boy, waiting in line to get into the John Edwards rally in Johnstown, Pennsylvania.

Sunday, September 19, 2004

Dirty Dog

Stand back, everyone. He plays dirty. He's a Bush, afterall.

*thanks to oyster for the picture.

Dummocrats! It's a Pun.

Surfing the net for stories this fine Sunday afternoon, I came across the wonderful people at Wonderful, wonderful people. The first post I see, entitled "Why 'Football Fans for Truth' Matters", can be summed up by saying that people shouldn't vote for Kerry because he doesn't know about baseball. He, evidently, doesn't care about baseball and because of that is out of touch with the people of this fine nation. They say,

As an American, there are certain things you should know in order to be culturally literate. The frozen tundra of Lambeau Field is one of those things. To not be familiar with Lambeau Field, to not know your Buckeyes from your Wolverines shows a disdain for the things that the rest of America really cares about. But that makes sense, because John Kerry isn't like you or me. He's better than us.
I disdain Americans and piss in their general direction, I guess. Where the hell is Lambeau Field and who cares? I know where PNC Park is, and I know where Three Rivers Stadium used to be. I know how much fun I had as a kid going to watch the Pirates or the Steelers, or to the rink to watch the Penguins, or to see Pitt kick the socks off Penn State. Does this make me better than anyone else? No.

I think it's Krissy Fedora who's being the snob and showing a disdain against Americans. Not everyone shows her passion for sports. She's saying that unless you follow exactly the same things she follows, and love exactly the same thing she loves, you don't know shit and you are -- as I've been called lately -- "a useless waste of breathing air."

She goes on to say that,
He's a faker. He's a panderer. He's lying about who he is in order to get votes. I'd respect the guy a hell of a lot more if, when asked questions like this, he simply said he didn't watch a lot of baseball. Of course, that would require Kerry to give a simple, truthful answer. That's something he's apparently incapable of doing.
Kerry, evidently, lies about his Red Sox fanaticism. Like that's a big deal, but anyway. Let's tweak the wording of what she wrote and see if it sounds like anyone you know, or anything you'd have been thinking yourself.
He's a faker. He's a panderer. He's lying about who he is in order to get votes. I'd respect the guy a hell of a lot more if, when asked questions like this, he simply said he didn't fulfill his obligations to the National Guard. Of course, that would require [enter name here] to give a simple, truthful answer. That's something he's apparently incapable of doing.
Which one of these is more pressing to you, the voter? The man in the second scenario will never come clean with his answer, as he's even incapable of admitting failure as well. But that's neither here nor there for this post.

She closes with,
But I think it's important to remember that Kerry has never been a leader, unless you count his months in Vietnam (and we've all seen how well he did with that). He's never been a Governor. He's never even been the senior Senator from his state. He doesn't have any leadership roles in Congress. He's never been in charge of a business.
Who does she think she's fooling, honestly? Bush was Governor of a state where the Lt Governor has more power and influence -- hardly the leadership role needed to be the most powerful man in the world. Bush has certainly never "even been the senior Senator from his state" nor has he had "any leadership roles in Congress." Though, Bush did run for Congess once. What foreign policy know-how did Bush have when he took office? What did he know about global economics or free trade? What did he know about anything?

And, perhaps the most damaging, Kerry has never been in charge of a business. Oh darn. But the bar has been set so low by Bush, he won't have much trouble jumping that hurdle. Donald Kaul of the Houston Chronicle (the militant arm of the liberal media, to be sure) said about Bush, "Generally, he has spent his life being rescued by his friends from one failed business deal after another."

Where is their argument? Just give me one good reason, honestly.

Saturday, September 18, 2004

Gospel Truth

A loyal reader, who found this church sign in his small community this week, sent in the following picture. I'm so glad the message is getting out there.

Edwards Rally

I'm going to see John Edwards tomorrow at an appropriately called "Edwards Rally." I'm actually pretty excited just being able to say that I went to such a thing. It sounds, like, super fun because, like, he's so cute with that smile of his. So cute.

Political gatherings are fun. You see the strangest things -- sights you've never seen before, sounds you've never heard before. Hell, how many people lost their virginity at the last Gore Rally? In fact, I almost went -- came thiiis close -- to the recent Bush Rally in my area just so I could have the experience of seeing a human sacrifice. I heard they do that there. Just a rumor. I dunno.

I'd tell you where this rally is, but then I'd have to kill you. I don't want stalkers (*cough cough* Sarah B *cough*) having any more access to me than they already do. Let's just say that I'll let you know what happened tomorrow night when I return.

"Four more years, four more years." Dammit, that's not it. "Forty-six more days, forty-six more days!" That's it. I always get them confused.

Just Thinking

In my little bit of spare time today, I got to thinking about a comment someone made within earshot of me the other day at the local high school. She was a parent talking to her daughter's teacher about this and that and somehow, for whatever reason, the parent thought it would be appropriate to tell the teacher that she didn't approve of homosexual teachers teaching her child. Fine, whatever, I thought. Doesn't matter to me. She's entitled to her beliefs. The teacher, not sure how to respond because she's both married and with kids, fidgeted a bit and then changed the subject.

Now, looking back at the situation as it unfolds in my mind, I wish that the teacher would have confronted the parent about that belief. It's unfounded and shows how little she thinks about her beliefs before putting so much stock into them, really.

What if we took out homosexual and changed it to something else. Say, for example, we use Jew. "I don't approve of Jew teachers teaching my child." Yeah, that'll go over really well.

But I think we put too much faith in what impact teachers have on the lives of our kids. Sure, they shape and mold our children into what we want them to be. We teach them to make the right decisions and to stay away from drugs, sex and alcohol -- not to mention Rock n Roll -- but teachers can only go so far.

But when it comes to this above-and-beyond influence teachers exude to students, it's always the bad things we see in their lifestyles or their behaviors. Take the following dialogue, for example, which I'm pretty sure never happened.

"Yeah, Susie and I are getting divorced."
"Oh man, it's because your third grade teacher was divorced, isn't it?"

Silly, silly.

"Well, I'm gay."
"Wow, it's because your high school English teacher was gay, right?"

"I'm having a sex-change operation."
"Damn, your homeroom teacher was a woman!"

Who cares if your child's teacher is a flaming homosexual? Is it really going to matter in the long run? And, by the way, how would you ever know? One in ten. ONE IN TEN!

"Susie and I have been married for fifty years this Tuesday."
"Congrats. It's because your priest was married for... oh wait, no he wasn't."

Friday, September 17, 2004

Another Evangelical

I'm trying to find the correct name for it ... this utter absolute, asinine, idiotic stupidity of men marrying men. ... I've never seen a man in my life I wanted to marry. And I'm gonna be blunt and plain; if one ever looks at me like that, I'm gonna kill him and tell God he died.

--Jimmy Swaggert, U.S. evangelist.

He's truly a man of God, ain't he? Homosexuality is way worse than lying to God, totally.

Who's Gay Now?

When you masturbate, you’re already sort of a homosexual, because by nature, self-gratification is a same-sex act.

--Jed Smock, campus evangelist.

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

Google Email

I have a few Google email invitations that are burning a hole in my inbox. First come, first serve. You can leave a comment or email me at

attackzacattack (at) yahoo (dot) com

You can't beat Google email, really. One thousand megabytes! I'm only getting a hundred from my Yahoo account and I once thought that was a lot. Let me know.

He Said Rainbow

"Ah, I'd love to wear a rainbow every day,
And tell the world that everything's okay."

--Johnny Cash, Man In Black

Assault This

A smarty-pants friend of mine (read: Paige) mentioned last night that I had not commented on the newly expired Assault Rifle ban that had been in effect for the last ten years. She thought perhaps I was out celebrating with my AK-47s and my Uzis and so far did not have time to post anything. Sadly, Miss Pagina, no. You know better.

Although I have a lot to say on the subject, I find it hard to enunciate something that I had not posted before. What else is there to say?

But I do have one point to make. According to the Guardian, an online English newspaper, 68% of Americans supported an extention of the ban, including 32% of members of the NRA. It also had the support of police federations. In Pennsylvania alone, 107 police chiefs were in favor of extending the ban. In Ohio, 174. In Texas, 24. In Florida, 143. And yet Republican bigwigs, like Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, said,

I think the will of the American people is consistent with letting it expire, so it will expire.
This is so not true. A whole lotta people wanted to see this ban continue on for a long time, including me. Sixty-eight percent of the nation wanted a ban that President Bush said he supported back in 2000. Dennis Duggan from Newsday wrote,
Running for election in 2000, Bush backed the ban on assault weapons like those used in the slaughter of schoolkids, their teachers and their parents in a Russian schoolhouse a few weeks ago.
But that was then. And this is now. In another flip flop in policy by our Commander in Chief, he no longer felt so impressed by this ban.

The House majority leader, Rep. Tom DeLay, R-Texas, dismissed the ban as "a feel-good piece of legislation" and said flatly that it would expire Monday, even if Bush made an effort to renew it.
If the president asked me, it would still be no. He knows, because we don't have the votes to pass the assault weapons ban. It will expire Monday, and that's that.
But you and I both can tell that this is a sham. If the President asked the House Majority Leader to support the ban on assault rifles, with the will of a majority of Americans, he would be on top of it in no time.

But that statement says a lot, doesn't it? "If the president asked me..." If, if, if. He obviously never did ask him to move in favor of the assault rifle ban. Reporter Tiffany Cochran of News 11 Atlanta wrote, "President Bush promised to renew the ban if it came to his desk, but never pressed Congress to act." He speaks tough, and we know he can act tough -- just not when it comes to keeping AK-47s with bayonets and silencers off the streets and out of the hands of those who aren't fighting in civil wars. In fact,
The White House press secretary, Scott McClellan, reiterated on Wednesday that "the president supports the reauthorization of the current law." But when asked repeatedly by reporters what, if anything, Bush was doing to make that happen, McClellan avoided the question. "The president doesn't set the congressional timetable," he said, adding: "Congress sets the timetable. And the president's views are very clear."
Frist, DeLay, Bush, et al. claim they didn't have the votes to extend the Assault Rifles Ban and wouldn't let it go for an up-down vote. And yet, they all knew that they didn't have the votes to pass the Federal Marriage Amendment, but had no trouble pushing it as hard as they could until it was finally dead -- for this season, anyway.

And that brings me to my point.

An Ohio poll, which we'll use as a national average for the sake of argument, found that as of August 26, 2004, 56% of Ohionians support a federal amendment defining marriage as between a man and a woman. Fifty-six percent.

More people wanted the extention to the ban than they wanted the FMA, and yet which did the Republicans -- who control both houses of Congress and the White House -- put all their effort into passing?

"I think the will of the American people is consistent with letting it expire," says Bill Frist. They speak for the majority of Americans. They are in tune with what Americans want.

No they do not. Americans don't care about who marries whom. If they do, they have some priority issues. Americans want assault rifles off the streets and away from their neighborhoods. Which is deadlier: an Uzi or Elton John?

Republicans bucked in the face of the police officers who wanted the ban, but they'll protect you and me from ever having to witness the most fabulous wedding we've ever seen.

Thank you, Republicans. Thank you, God, for Republicans.

Saturday, September 11, 2004

Social Plight

"Who weeps for these people?"

--Ralph Nader, after telling supporters Saturday that a far larger number of Americans die each year from poverty, hunger, pollution, dangerous jobs or poor access to high-quality health care than terrorism.

Who, indeed?

International Flip-Floppers

"In an unusual retreat under public pressure, President Vladimir V. Putin on Friday promised an open inquiry into the recent slaughter of hundreds of hostages in a schoolhouse, although the forum he chose left critics doubtful of his good faith."

--Seth Mydans, New York Times


Hmm, sounds so familiar.

"Both President Bush and Vice President Dick Cheney urged Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle four months ago not to push for an investigation into the events of Sept. 11, Daschle said on Sunday." -- Reuters, May 26, 2002

"President Bush personally asked Senate Majority Leader Tom Daschle Tuesday to limit the congressional investigation into the events of September 11, congressional and White House sources told CNN." --CNN, January 29, 2002

And then there was this...

"The Bush administration yesterday endorsed setting up an independent commission to investigate the failures of U.S. intelligence, law enforcement and other agencies before the Sept. 11 attacks, reversing the administration's position in the face of mounting support in Congress for such an inquiry.

President Bush had adamantly opposed an independent inquiry, saying it would compromise national security and distract from counterterrorism efforts. But in a letter to House Speaker Dennis Hastert, R-Ill., Bush's congressional lobbyist said the White House had changed its opinion." --Seattle Post-Intelligencer, September 21, 2002

Friday, September 10, 2004

New Documentation

Yet another document has been unearthed recently in connection with George W. Bush's honorable discharge from the National Guard. Obtained exclusively by the Zac Attack, this document blows the socks off any and all questions about the veracity of Bush's discharge. It is there -- in black and white.

Crazy Religious Folk

Thanks to the great Jesus' General for the heads up, I just couldn't go without commenting on it myself. It's just too crazy to pass up.

According to the Columbian, from Clark County, Washington, the Bible apparently inspired Edwin Bruce Baxter, 33, to try to circumcise his 8-year-old son. But then he called 911 because he was concerned about the amount of blood the youngster was losing. I'm assuming he cut a little too deep.

He has been charged with first-degree assault of a child. If convicted, he faces at least 10 years in prison.

Baxter was arrested Friday and taken to the Clark County Jail. His son was taken to Southwest Washington Medical Center, where he received several stitches. Several stitches? Can you say OUCH?! He got stitches where his father tried to circumcise him. Jees louise.

According to a probable-cause affidavit written by a Clark County sheriff's deputy, Baxter said he tried to circumcise his son with a knife in the bathroom after reading Genesis 17 and Exodus 4.

Okay, just to lighten up this morbid news story, let's take a look at Genesis 17:12. God says to Abraham,

For the generations to come every male among you who is eight days old must be circumcised...

Eight days, eight years... They're similar, right? At least he got the right number! And, then there's Exodus 4:25!

But Zipporah took a flint knife, cut off her son's foreskin and touched Moses' feet with it...

Excellent imagery. And we wonder why people are so weird!

When Republicans Attack

Of all the dirty tricks...

A member of the audience pulls a demonstrator's hair as he forces her out of an auditorium where President Bush was addressing a crowd of supporters at Byers Choice in Colmar, Pa. Thursday Sept. 9, 2004.

Uh huh, Sure

"I did not say if Kerry is elected, we will be hit by a terrorist attack."

--Vice President Dick Cheney, to the Cincinnati Enquirer.


"Because if we make the wrong choice, then the danger is that we'll get hit again."

--Vice President Dick Cheney, to a Town Hall meeting.

Thursday, September 09, 2004

Fun for Parties

George Bush Impersonator, John Morgan.

For those of you thinking what I'm thinking, my birthday's in April.

Things Remembered

Sometimes I think I live in a time warp -- a place, arealm if you will, where people don't remember the past. They don't recall past mistakes, and don't split hairs about doing them again. And they really don't mind forgetting about past promises and what the consequences of that brings.

If I remember correctly, I believe once upon a time Mindy Tucker, the then-Governor Bush's spokeswoman, said

And I think it's important to note that Gov. Bush has said that, if elected, he will uphold the honor and dignity of that office."

Now, I understand that Bush's spokeswoman said that, and not the Governor (now-President) himself, and surely not the Vice-President. Cheney is a different creature. He doesn't hold himself to the laws of regular people. To him, Iraq and al-Qaeda were in cahoots, even though no influential people still believe that.

He's something else, to be sure. He marches to the beat of his own drum.

"Because if we make the wrong choice, then the danger is that we'll get hit again. That we'll be hit in a way that will be devastating from the standpoint of the United States, and that we'll fall back into the pre-9/11 mind-set if you will, that in fact these terrorist attacks are just criminal acts, and that we're not really at war."

In other words, Vote for Bush, or Die.

As long as Bush/Cheney is still in the White House, there is no danger that we'll get hit again. None. Of course not. A Kerry/Edwards White House will surely bring the wrath of al-Qaeda, because they hate liberals almost more than conservatives. Or I suppose it's always a possibility that a Kerry/Edwards White House will bring upon the wrath of God. Because, as we know, God's a Republican.


On June 23, responding to Hannity & Colmes guest Reverend Franklin Graham's comment "I don't think God is a Republican or a Democrat," Sean Hannity quipped, "He's [God] no Democrat, Reverend."

What an asshole.

What Happened?

And the bounce is dead.

Bush 47%
Kerry 45%.

Tuesday, September 07, 2004

Polling Data

"Before the Republican convention, 86 percent of the population thought Zell Miller was a professional golfer. After the convention, 92 percent of the population would not like to be in his foursome."

-- Lee Kalcheim, "The Latest Poll", New York Times

Monday, September 06, 2004

Monday Moment of Zen

Here's some humor for your Monday night. Enjoy, because I certainly did. Just let the imagery wash over you and watch it in your mind's eye.


The only truly electric moment came when John McCain decried "a disingenuous filmmaker who would have us believe that Saddam’s Iraq was an oasis of peace." The crowd erupted in jeers, forcing McCain to stop his speech.

And then the crowd spotted him, Michael Moore -- Michael Moore! -- sitting in one of the press risers, a guest columnist for USA Today. Baseball-hatted, disheveled, he sucked in the derision, holding up his arms aloft like a conquering hero.

I saw one elderly delegate extend Moore his middle finger. Moore responded in kind, forming an L with thumb and forefinger, calling the entire Republican Party a bunch of losers.

Sad Choices

"This party has a choice to make, about whether it will be the party of Rudy Giuliani and Arnold Schwarzenegger or the party of Jerry Falwell and Pat Buchanan."

--Republican Log Cabin executive director, Patrick Guerriero.

Dominicans For Bush

In a recent article by Barry Yeoman entitled, "Immoderate Republicans," he writes about 32-year-old Kirsys Vasquez. She's a production manager for an interior designer and a self-described "Dominican for Bush."

A lifelong Democrat, Vasquez voted for Al Gore four years ago -- and now, she says, "I hate myself" for that vote. The political conversion came while she was pregnant.


"If Al Gore was president, we’d have been bombed every week," she says. "The Democrats -- they’re not right to fight this war."

Yeah, because we're girlie-men. And yet, could this war be going any worse? Almost 1,000 dead, people wondering the reason for war still a year and a half later, no clear answers coming from the President. Was it about the WMDs or wasn't it? Was it to depose Saddam or wasn't it? Was it for the oil or wasn't it? Was it to show US strength or wasn't it?


Shock horror! I can't believe it! He's like totally my idol and everything. If he did cocaine, I totally think that he'd automatically be a horrible person and I could never vote for him because of that. I'd have to change my vote to Kerry. I can vote for someone who's had more deathrow inmates executed in 8 years than any other governor in the history of the United States, someone who invaded two separate and sovereign countries in a little less than 4 years, and someone who was a raging alcoholic, though never received formal treatment, but cocaine is too crazy. It's a sin!

George W Bush snorted cocaine at Camp David, a new book claims. His wife Laura also allegedly tried cannabis in her youth. Author Kitty Kelley says in her biography The Family: The Real Story of the Bush Dynasty, that the US President first used coke at university in the mid-1960s. She quotes his former sister-in-law Sharon Bush who claims: "Bush did coke at Camp David when his father was President, and not just once either."

If he did, why not just admit it? I'm sure the American people, those who like him now anyway, will see it as a character flaw, but will respect him for his humility and his honesty. Not affirming, but not denying it is bad enough, but it gives the appearance of you having something to hide. And please don't tell me you think you have a right to privacy when you're the President of the United States. You can't even get a blowjob without hearing about it for the next 18 months.

Just tell the truth, George. Oh what a tangled web we weave!

Missing in Action

Sing with me!

Where, oh where, have his Texas Air National Guard papers gone? Where, oh where, can they be? It seems as though he's been lying for four years. Do others see this or is it me?

Documents that should have been written to explain gaps in President Bush's Texas Air National Guard service are missing from the military records released about his service in 1972 and 1973, according to regulations and outside experts.

No such records have been made public and the government told The Associated Press in response to a Freedom of Information Act lawsuit that it has released all records it can find.

Why can't he just admit that he never served? If he did, wouldn't the Republicans have paraded those who served with him and can contest that he was there with them on stage and show the world that the Commander-in-Chief isn't really just a weenie in a flight suit?

Sunday, September 05, 2004

Praise for Kerry

I was searching the net for some praise to send John Kerry's way. I know it's hard work, he's such a dastardly bastard, but I did find an introduction by a Democrat Senator on March 1, 2001. I think it's really sweet. Check it out.

My job tonight is an easy one: to present to you one of this nation's authentic heroes, one of this party's best-known and greatest leadersand a good friend.

He was once a lieutenant governor – but he didn't stay in that office 16 years, like someone else I know. It just took two years before the people of Massachusetts moved him into the United States Senate in 1984.

In his 16 years in the Senate, John Kerry has fought against government waste and worked hard to bring some accountability to Washington.

Early in his Senate career in 1986, John signed on to the Gramm-Rudman-Hollings Deficit Reduction Bill, and he fought for balanced budgets before it was considered politically correct for Democrats to do so.

John has worked to strengthen our military, reform public education, boost the economy and protect the environment. Business Week magazine named him one of the top pro-technology legislators and made him a member of its "Digital Dozen."

John was re-elected in 1990 and again in 1996 – when he defeated popular Republican Governor William Weld in the most closely watched Senate race in the country.

John is a graduate of Yale University and was a gunboat officer in the Navy. He received a Silver Star, Bronze Star and three awards of the Purple Heart for combat duty in Vietnam. He later co-founded the Vietnam Veterans of America.

Aww, isn't that sweet? Sounds like the Senator really has affection for Kerry. Who said that? Zell Miller, of course. Why'd I hear that name lately?

What a hack.

Saturday, September 04, 2004

Second Amendment

Ya know, I don't care if you have a handgun in your house and you keep it in your nightstand in case a burglar enters your house in the middle of night. Statistically speaking, you're more likely to hurt yourself or a family member than an intruder, but that's okay. It's your perogative. I don't care if you have ten rifles in a gun cabinet somewhere where you showcase them like rare jewels, for all to see. I don't care if you use every last one of your hundred guns to go hunting, or for sport, or what have you. I don't care.

But I do care if you have semi-automatics. No one needs such a weapon. Guns don't kill people, people kill people. But guns facilitate in that action. And AK-47s make it that much easier to kill off a whole group of people, as well.

There are limits to the First Amendment. Words used to incite violence cannot be protected by the right to free speech because it is not in the spirit of the right. One cannot scream "Fire!" in a crowded movie theater and claim free speech. Only death and panic can be assumed to happen after such speech.

The same is true with the Second Amendment. You can bear arms. Sure, it was meant for people in a militia to protect their state, but who cares? Just own guns because you can. But no one needs an assualt rifle to protect his family, to hunt deer or turkey. It's dangerous and silly.

I thought we all could agree on this, so imagine my surprise when Republican Alan Keyes, Maryland resident running for U.S. Senate in Illinois believes the U.S. Constitution grants properly trained private individuals the right to own and carry machine guns.

But the GOP nominee for U.S. Senate argued the founding fathers intended the Second Amendment to allow people to carry the types of weapons "customarily carried in those days by ordinary infantry soldiers."

"And, yes, does that mean that in this day and age people would have the right to have access to the kind of the weapons our ordinary infantry people have access to? With proper training and so forth to make sure that they could handle them successfully, that's exactly what was meant."

What can you say to that?

"You're not talking about giving citizens access to atom bombs and other things," the former presidential candidate said. "That's ridiculous."

Oh, that's ridiculous. That's ridiculous! I get it. Atom bombs and "other things" are ridiculous, not automatic weaponry.

Jees, I guess he's right. Don't be so silly.

Where, O Where?

An interesting thought from Amygdala. The following words are not found in President George W. Bush's entire acceptance speech at the Republican National Committee on September 2nd, 2004.

You can search all you want, you won't be able to find:

North Korea
bin Laden
flawed intelligence
Abu Ghraib
military service
honored dead
our dead

The only mention of "science" was in "We will place a new focus on math and science [in high school]."

The only mention of "crime" was in regard to Saddam Hussein.

The only mention of "Republican" was "I brought Republicans and Democrats together to strengthen Medicare."

The only mention of "duty" was "I believe the most solemn duty of the American President is to protect the American people."

The only mention of "war" was "Again, my opponent takes a different approach. In the midst of war, he has called American allies...."

The only mention of "win" was "win this election."

Priorities, priorities.


And who could forget:

The men and women who wear the uniform of the United States represent the very best of America.

--Vice President Dick Cheney, Republican Convention, 2004.

The very best. Unless, of course, he's running against two men who never served.


An interesting side note, the number of minutes that President Bush, Vice-President Dick Cheney, the Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld, the assistant Defense Secretary Paul Wolfowitz, the former chairman of the Defence Policy Board Richard Perle, the White House Chief of Staff Andrew Card, and Chief Political Strategist Karl Rove -- all major Iraq war proponents -- served in combat (combined) is equal to zero (0).

Health Care

When liars lie:

Our nation has the best health care in the world, and President Bush is making it more affordable and accessible to all Americans. And there is more to do.

--Vice President Dick Cheney, Republican Convention, 2004.

But wait, the United States' health care system is ranked by the United Nations as being a very sad 37. But who's checking? It sounded good in the speech and no one questions the vice-president!